A day with John Mayer

Besides the music I played during my show this morning, all I have listened to today is John Mayer. Crazy, but true. Something about his music makes it okay for me to feel. Regardless of what the emotion is, I feel like it's okay for me to feel it for what it's worth.


Exhausted track (because the repeat button is my friend) - Come back to bed


Exhausted track 1- Stop this train
Exhausted track 2- I'm gonna find another you
Exhausted track 3- Vultures

I need to get my hands on 'Room for squares'...

When do you call it quits?

This month (all 11 days of it) and last month have been a little tough. I am in a position where I feel like I'm not being appreciated. Not only that I think... No! I KNOW that I'm being treated badly. People who know me will be very surprised that I am even in this situation, because if I don't like something I call it quits and move on. I don't believe that life should be a constant struggle.

After all my years of 'I don't like this sh&%, so I'm leaving'. I find myself elbow deep in s%&t that I don't like and I feel like I'm stuck. I can't be too specific, but all I can say is that this 'soul hurting' stuff is also helping me with my EP. This EP is my first major step in this journey. I have been making cute baby steps and now I'm taking my first big girl step. I don't want anything to interfere with that. At the same time I feel like this situation I've put myself in is draining me. I don't have the energy to do a lot of things. It's counter-productive... In a way.

In a book I read (by Dr John F. Demartini) he says we always have a choice, either:
Do A
Do B
Do Both
Or none of them

That's 4 choices and I'm still confused. When is enough, enough? Should I just bite the bullet and carry on for another 6 months? At what cost?

When I started this journey I said that I was willing to go where no one else was willing to go, do whatever it takes and it seems I'm doing it. It's not fun, but I'm doing it. I guess I am the only person that will know when to cal it quits. Whether or not I actually do that is another story.

The week that was

This week went by pretty quickly and I managed to get quite a bit done as well.

1. Have been doing an hour of guitar + an hour of piano each day- YAY!!!
2. Didn't do guitar or piano this wknd though (brain needs a rest).
3. Had Sushi last night.
4. I am besotted with a song on Common's 'Electric Circus'. The song is called Electric Wire Hustler Flower. Not sure why, but it makes me wanna put my headphones on and take a walk on the promenade and just be alone with my thoughts.
5. Said for the first time on air that the Saturday show will be no longer at the end of the month. I'm a little sad, but also relieved because I can actually say it now.


6. Saw a movie on Saturday: Jumper... Uhmm the 'effects' were spot on, the story line needed a little more work and that is where the movie failed me. It seemed like a rehearsal for the real movie. Even Marcee wasn't impressed and she isn't even that critical of movies.


7. Started writing a new song and it's coming along very nicely. I'm thinking of adding a little bit of 'hip hop' to this one... I can't really explain it. I guess you'll have to wait till May.


8. You will notice that I have committed to a release month - MAY. I'm not sure on what day though. I will only know that in April :)


9. I finished Suze Orman's book (Women and Money) it was very interesting and it made me look at my relationship with money. I am already working on saving myself and my money ha ha ha ha. Will let you know how that is going. I had already started saving, but now I am more informed ;)
   
10. Marcee was a sickling this week. Dr booked her off for 3 days, but she is much better now. I don't know how many times I told her to go and see a Dr, but NOOOOOOO!!! She never listens to me.
11. Interviewed HHP on Saturday morning show. WHAT A LOVELY GUY!!!! He make you wish the interview would never end. I respect how real he is too ;)

This made my Sunday morning

I would not have been able to keep a straight face

Little brothers ARE good for something

Stretching Marcee's new shoes :)

Such pretty feet for a boy ha ha ha ha. I guess I will never outgrow dressing my little brother up ha ha ha ha!!!

What I miss about a 'traditional' job

Work parties. Oh, how I miss the good times.

I work by myself because the main office for our radio station is in Johannesburg and I have my own office here in Cape Town. So I don't get to hang out with all my colleagues. That being said I don't REGRET leaving advertising.

I am happy with my 'new' job in radio. It's not where I want to end up (OBVIOUSLY) and this is why I have this blog to share my journey. This is a journey that I am most proud to be taking. I am scared and sometimes emotional when I think about how far I've come and how far I still have to go.

The week that was

I have been MIA again... There has been lots happening and I was also ill during the wknd.

1. Met up with C.B (producer) and that first track is sounding very nice, a lot more 'old school' than I anticipated, but nice.
2. Finished reading a very interesting book Capitalist N*#$er. WOW! I enjoyed most of it, it was a real eye opener. Definitely changed the way i look at the world and myself. WOW!!I just couldn't put it down.
3. Little brother is still alive and has to stay in my TINY apartment, for another month till res opens up. The reason i say he is still alive is because he does things that I simply don't allow in my small space. Initially I was being a good host, but I'm slowly morphing into INSANE BIG SISTER.
4. Missed another one of Bridget's get together's. She's going to start thinking that I am avoiding her, when really the last 3 wknds have been intense: emotionally, physically and mentally.
5. I got my finances in order- started reading Suze Orman's book (Women and money). Funny, she was on Oprah this afternoon, talking about the same book. NICE!
6. I started eating junk again and then stopped. I really am addicted to the 'bad stuff', but I am learning how to practise self control.
7. I ordered something from Mr Delivery and they didn't DELIVER!! Perhaps the name was a little misleading. I assumed that they would ACTUALLY DELIVER the food that I had ordered. Funny that!
8. have resumed my guitar lessons- with me, the book and the DVD and so far so good. Fingers are a little sore again, but not enough for me to stop. Music gives me way too much joy?
9. Oh... I broke one of the strings on my guitar and then had to walk to music store (which isn't far from home) because car was in for service. String wasn't expensive, but the tuner (that I had not planned on buying) was. DAMMIT! It does help a LOT though ;)
10. Plans for NPO are coming along nicely, worked a lot on that. It will be registered by the end of this month.
11. Paid a traffic fine today and it felt PRETTY DAMN GOOD.
12. Took the car in for annual service. I can't believe I've had my little Jazz for more than a year now. She is so good to me, that when the car payments are taken from my account I don't even complain. Having a car has made a HUGE difference in my life.
13. Marcee passed her LEARNERS... it's still a big deal for us :)

That's it!!!